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View Full Version : The Onion: "Patriots' Season Perfect For Rest Of Nation" (HILARIOUS!)


jackacid
02-08-2008, 05:31 PM
FOXBOROUGH, MA—As the once-invincible, still-insufferable Patriots attempt to come to grips with their 17-14 Super Bowl loss to the Giants, the death of their dream to go undefeated, and the possible end of their dynasty, almost every other person in America is reveling in what they consider the perfect ending to New England's season.

"I just couldn't imagine a better ending to the Patriots odyssey," said Simon Williams, a Kansas City-area football fan who usually watches the college game but found himself caught up in the Patriots' sheer loathsomeness during the season. "The utter lack of humility they displayed alongside an equal lack of any joy in the game, that toad of a coach, and that cologne-ad quarterback… If they have to act that badly while playing that well, you really want to see them fail in the biggest way possible. Thank God almighty, that's what we got."

Did their team plane land safely back in Foxborough?" Colgrave asked. "It didn't happen to lose altitude over Boston, burst into a cartwheel of flames, throwing players like Roman candles across New England, and then slam into few dozen loudmouth Patriots' fans houses? It didn't? Well, I guess no football season is perfect."

http://www.theonion.com/content/news/patriots_season_perfect_for_rest?utm_source=onion_ rss_daily

Big Blue
02-08-2008, 05:34 PM
LOL @ the plane crash quote.

Swordfysh
02-08-2008, 05:40 PM
"Cartwheel of flames"...LMAO!!

NiNeRtHeOrY
02-08-2008, 06:19 PM
"Did you see [Giants defensive tackle Jay] Alford smack Brady right in the face on that last drive?" said Bellvue, WA newsstand operator Christian Dansby. "Brady was almost offended. I think he forgot for a few months there that he was a football player. It was just perfect."



:hoppy: